Is Your Family Needing Support to Adjust to Change or Recent Stressors?

  • Do you have a child whose behavior and needs impact the whole family?

  • Has your family grown via adoption or marriage?

  • Is the stress of beginning or resuming school especially difficult on your family?

If you are looking specifically for child therapy, you can read more about my services here.

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Perhaps you adopted a child and you are struggling to build safety and security in your relationship or to understand the meaning of their behavior. Or maybe you are looking for ways to support their healing and growth while honoring their needs for connection and identity around their culture, history and original family.

Parenting is a journey that is often filled with unforeseen obstacles, many of which can be difficult to manage alone. For instance, challenges in babies and young children can initially appear as issues with eating, sleeping, transitioning to school, or separating from a parent’s side, which can be taxing for parents who are already exhausted. Blended families frequently have issues with grieving losses, differences in parenting styles and balancing the needs of adults and children. And couples having children for the first time can find themselves overwhelmed by the unexpected needs of their child or the uncertainty and pressure of their new roles as caregivers.

Being a parent is never easy, but that doesn’t mean you have to navigate your family’s challenges alone. Whatever your situation is, my playful and research-based approach to therapy offers a chance for greater understanding and profound healing that can strengthen your entire family. 

Many Parents Struggle to Understand Their Child’s Behavior

Although on the surface it may not be obvious, all families have their own unique problems to deal with. It’s just a normal part of being human. No family is perfect. However, when a child’s behaviors or emotional issues affect the entire family dynamic, it can often leave parents feeling powerless and afraid. Unfortunately, many families lack the support to navigate these challenges successfully.

Children who have experienced early adversity or trauma can have difficulty regulating their emotions, adjusting to change, or following instructions, which can cause tension and frustration between family members. Others may have neurodivergent qualities, such as sensory sensitivities, symptoms of hyperactivity, or difficulties with peers, that are only now coming to light. In almost all cases, behavior is an attempt to regulate oneself or meet a need, but it can be so hard to see when you are in the middle of it!

In contrast, adoptive families are often balancing the needs of their adoptive and biological children, along with their own needs for self-care and connection. Parenting a child who has experienced loss, early adversity, and trauma can impact relationships with extended family, friends, and your faith community. What may have started out as a lot of support, can turn to criticism or misunderstanding as your child develops and their needs become more clear. And because private agencies sometimes downplay the role of trauma or early adversity, many adoptive families run into obstacles that they never saw coming.

As parents, we want to spare our kids the pain that we, ourselves, have endured. But often, our children’s behavior can actually awaken our own childhood experiences and unhealed wounds, which can leave us feeling all sorts of complex and unexpected emotions. And culturally, we continue to live in a society that focuses on rewards and punishments for guiding behavior even when science clearly shows us that what kids need most is connection and relationships to regulate, relate, and grow.  So it’s no wonder that many parents are left feeling overwhelmed.

Fortunately, working with a family therapist can give you much needed support as well as insights and concrete tools that will help bring everyone together while protecting your child’s development and your family’s peace of mind.

Therapy Offers a Space Of Healing for the Entire Family

Counseling gives you and your family members a chance to be seen and to understand the strengths and resources that make each of you unique and strong. Together, we can explore and address frustrating patterns and mis-connection by encouraging safety, playfulness, connection and understanding. More specifically, I can help you strengthen the relationship between you and your child while we model and practice regulating our bodies and emotions together (co-regulation), coping strategies, and build warmth and compassion for yourselves and others through playful interactions. My play-based and relationship-focused approach is informed by the latest research regarding the relational neurosciences, trauma, and attachment theories.

Typically, I’ll meet with you—the parents—alone for the first few sessions to learn more about your child’s background and your family’s history. We’ll explore your concerns, the wishes you have for your family’s growth, and the goals you have for counseling. Then, we can work on identifying and understanding the roots of your child’s challenges to give you greater insight and empathy for their lived experiences. Finally, I’ll prepare you for what a family therapy session might look like and how I will support you.

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When meeting with you as a family, we’ll start sessions with a brief check-in to share successes. All of my sessions are very focused on supporting playful interaction, often involving a snack, games, songs, joint sensory play and movement that offer opportunities for connection, self-awareness and co-regulation.  The focus is on play because that is the language of children. At the end of our meetings we usually do a fun good-bye ritual to help your child transition out with greater ease.

Part of the healing process involves gaining a deeper understanding of your child’s behaviors and what those patterns are trying to tell you. Once you realize and understand their needs more fully, you can help them better regulate their emotions, minimize stressors, and navigate change in the long-term. My trauma and brain science-informed approach to therapy puts you in a position where you can guide and interact with your child naturally. Acting as a coach, I can support you in building self-awareness and experience using the strategies and skills we develop in-session to better communicate, connect with, and support your family at home.

As a family therapist, adoptive parent, step-parent, and an adopted person myself,  I am well-acquainted with the challenges that many families face building and repairing relationships. I also know that human beings are naturally hard-wired for connection, which is why strong, healthy relationships are our greatest resources for healing and profound change. Working together as a team, I can help your family grow, heal generational patterns and build resilience to overcome future challenges. Whether you need guidance around supporting your child’s growth and healing, setting firm but kind boundaries, or bringing your family together, I can help.

Perhaps You are Considering Family Therapy but Still Have Some Concerns…

I’m a little concerned about the financial cost. The early years of a young person’s life are instrumental in their development. Our children’s first attachment relationships ultimately inform how they see themselves and how they approach relationships in the future. Intervening now, while their brains are growing rapidly and so receptive to change, can have a big impact on who they will become as a person and the choices they will make as an adult.

With a limited investment of time and money, you’ll be protecting their well-being in the long run while ensuring the success of the entire family moving forward. Addressing stressors and sources of conflict between you and your partner is also an investment in the health of each of you, your partnership/marriage, and family. You can also read more about some of the options I make available to families to help manage the expense of therapy here.

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Does counseling really need to be family-focused? Relationships are the foundation for our children’s growth, and although they can leave us vulnerable and open to being hurt, they are also powerful medicine. Relationships are where we heal. This is especially true for young children. While I am an experienced play therapist with extensive skills in building therapeutic relationships with children, the deepest healing work happens between you and your children in the ways you carry the work from our sessions into your home and your week.

By focusing and working together, I’ll be able to guide you with information, skills, and playful strategies that you can take with you to continue the healing process on your own. In that way, you will become a source of strength and support for your children and each other, allowing you to navigate new challenges without my guidance.

I’m afraid I’ll be blamed for what my child is going through. Whatever your situation may be, I offer a safe, nonjudgmental space where we can work together as a team on healing for everyone involved. Parenting children is hard AND a profound opportunity to grow as a human. It is also impossible to skip over our own childhood experiences and challenges as we become parents, they come right up to the surface (and sometimes out of our mouths) as we navigate similar stages and challenges with our children. That’s why a huge part of my approach to family counseling is centered around fostering self-compassion and understanding our shared human needs for safety and connection. Working with a family therapist offers a great opportunity to better understand yourself, build your individual and collective resilience, and strengthen your relationships.

Let Me Help Your Family Find Joy

If you are concerned about your child’s well-being and are ready and committed to doing the work to bring understanding and healing to your family, I would love to talk with you further to see if we are a good match! I offer a FREE 30 minute discovery session, via phone or video, where we can discuss your concerns and see if my unique approach to therapy can be a benefit to you and your whole family.

To request a discovery session please click the button below to visit my Contact page where you can send me a message.


 

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